It is better to give than to receive.  We all know that, but it can feel frustrating when you give to your Secret Sister like clockwork, and never hear from the person who has your name.  I know...this has happened to me...more than once! 

I have been through the entire cycle of Secret Sister programs without receiving a card or acknowledgement that anyone even has my name!  And to top it off, I gave several thoughtful gifts weekly (or monthly, depending on the rules) to the Secret Sister I had drawn, based on her interests.  I included encouraging cards, prayers, and nicely wrapped gifts.   I loved to have several items for her to unwrap each time, and I was certain my thoughtfulness would help her feel important and special!

Months passed by without even a note coming my way from whoever had drawn my name.  I just assumed that maybe she was praying for me...and that was valuable!  In fact, the last time this happened to me, the person I had been blessing was the same person who was supposed to be blessing me!  We had each other's names, and that certainly made it more interesting when it was time for the reveal!  I overdid it, and...well...she didn't do it!  But you know what?  I felt great that I was able to bless this person, and had been in the habit of praying for her!  It made the awkward uneven exchange feel like God had me in that situation as a ministry opportunity.  Everyone needs to feel loved, and I could pass that on to her!

Here is some encouragement if this scenario is happening to you!  Remember to pray daily for whoever has your name!  You have no idea what is really going on in the life of the person who has selected you...in reality, you won't even know who it us until the reveal.   Maybe she is going through a tough time.  Maybe she cannot afford to give generously...it happens!  Perhaps she is facing a health struggle, work or family stress, or simply cannot find the time in her chaotic schedule.  Face it, we are all human and life happens!  Keeping her in prayer gives you a better perspective and you can see her through the eyes of God's love.  Remember that love keeps no record of wrongs.  Don't hold a grudge, don't judge, just love!

Here is an idea for when the reveal comes.  Have a small gift and a card for whoever had drawn your name.  (Maybe she hasn't been receiving anything either!)  Tell her that you love her and have been keeping her in prayer!  Don't mention that you never heard from her, don't let your disappointment show, and don't brag about how much you blessed your Secret Sister.  Just show love and encouragement.  Don't make it about you.  Make it about God's love.  Extend that to her, along with grace.  It will make you feel better, too!

One more thing.  Never stop giving to your Secret Sister just because you haven't heard from anyone.  You know what it feels like to be forgotten, and you certainly do not want anyone else to experience that feeling.  Just be the best encourager that you can, and remember you are doing this unto the Lord!  He will bless you for your faithfulness and generosity!

Secret Sister Hugs,
​Alice